September 22, 2007

It is three days away.

Nearly two years have passed. It seems as if no time has passed in my heart. It is easier to get through a day without thinking of my little brother, but no less painful as I do. I mark the time by the growth of my children and wonder how Carl would have loved seeing them grow. I know how much he would love to go to the football games and watch my olderst son, Andrew, play trumpet in marching band. He would have gotten the biggest kick out of playing drums with Joshua. In a lot of ways I think they may be kindred spirits.Hope would just have her Uncle Carl wrapped around her finger.

I have to wonder how his friends are doing? In many ways Carl chose them as his "family" of choice. Being with and doing things with his friends was his life. He would do things for his friends that would go above and beyond what a "rational" person, e.g. ME, might do! lol BUt wasn't that what made him so special.

When he was a little boy, he never met a stranger. He attacked life with a giggle and a smile that as an older sibling I would envy. He LOVED life and every thing in it. Yet he never tried to be overbearing with his love of life. If you didn't want to enjoy life and you were around him, no problem. He was more than willing to have a good enough time for the both of you.

My little brother wasn't perfect. He almost never made up his bed. His logic? "I'll be sleeping in it again so why waste the effort." He also was not one ment to rise early. But I may have to give him a pass on this because he also wasn't one to go to bed until "plenty past twelve" either.

As football season begins this year, and if you happen to be watching a game and find yourself wishing that you could hear his quips about "this" or "that" during the game, call him. You can dial with your heart or with your phone. He is always there. He's never gone. Inside our hearts he still lives on.

So when you read this. Think of Carl's laugh, his infectious smile and sense of humor. Remember how MUCH he loved you and that so long as you rember him and share your stories and feelings with others who loved him too, he will be with you always.